OMG WE LOVE YOU
(We really do)
We just want to hug you and introduce you to our mamma in Italy.
Our mamma always told us "think before you open your mouth'
Obviously these people did not get mamma's memo!
(Any reference to any person or episode is not accidental, we just don't know their names or we would definitely tell you)
THE VILLAGE IDIOT
TOP 10 STUPID QUESTIONS OF
Q. Thirty dollars for a large Margherita!? That is crazy.
A. No wait, it gets even better, it's thirty three with the taxes, and it doesn't come with ranch sauce either.
Q. I'm not going to pay thirty dollars for a pizza, it's too much.
A. We agree with you, and in fact see all these people eating pizza at our tables? They are all taking advantage of our easy Botto pizza financial plan
Q. What is it?
A. Well. Get a pizza today with zero down payment and with 12 easy monthly payments of $2.99 with zero interest you may be able to enjoy one of our crazy expensive pizzas in just a few minutes. It all depends on how good your credit is.
Q. Are you serious?
A. Absolutely, and if you apply in the next five minutes we will include a portable pizza slicer for free.
Q. Are you going to run my credit for a pizza?
A) Only if you want it, we won't insist.
Q. I think this is a strange place, I better go somewhere else.
A. No wait, we also have another plan if your credit is not that great, you'll be approved in just minutes.
Q. No I think I'll go.
A. ( We could go on for hours)
This is the first time that someone made it to the village idiot even before he got to talk.
After few awesome manoeuvres with his car, he made the perfect Italian parking just right out of our door. Bravo!
A picture is worth a thousand words.
Q. Wild boar fettuccine? Is it really wild?
A. Can you keep a secret?
A. That wild boar wasn't really wild, it was one of our friend's pets that unfortunately passed away peacefully and we thought it would be a nice gesture to make some nice meat sauce with it.
A. Is it really good?
A. Ok I'll try it.
Q. God bless you.
Q. Are you guys open this weekend for brunch?
A. No we only open for dinner on weekends.
Q. But my friend told me you are open for brunch.
A. Oh well, in that case, if your friend told you so we are certainly open, we don't want to insult your friend.
Q. So you are open then?
A. For you and your friend absolutely!
Q. But your business hours says that you are closed
A. If your friend say that we are open we are open, period!
Q. I'll check with my friend then.
A. Sounds good.
Q. My favorite pizza is from North beach pizza.
A. Mine too.
Q. I always go there.
A. Me too.
Q. Why don't you guys make the pizza like them?
A. No one can make the pizza as good as they do
Q. Did you guys tried to make it like they do?
A. We tried for years and years but we just can't get it right.
Q. Maybe you should ask for the recipe, maybe if you offer some money.
A. Oh we never thought about it, I think tomorrow I'm going to call them and make them an offer. Thank you for your help.
Q. Any time man
A. ( Then he went back into the world)
Q. Is your basil pesto made with a lot of basil?
A. Yes is pretty much mostly basil.
Q. Can you make it without?
A. No really
Q. But I really like have pesto without basil many restaurant do it when I ask.
A. We can certainly do the tomato sauce without tomato, the meatballs with the balls on the side and fettuccine Alfredo without Alfredo
but no basil pesto without pesto
Q. Well I guess I'll take my business elsewhere
A. Maybe in some place where they make the basil pesto without basil
Q. Can I make a reservation for Christmas eve?
A. No I'm afraid we are closed on Christmas eve.
Q. So I can't make a reservation
A. We are going to be closed but if you like to make a reservation anyway we won't stop you,
you can also make a double reservation any time for Cristnmas day as will be closed that day too.
Q. So if we come you are going to be closed?
A. (This conversation lasted for quite a while and at the end we were not sure ourselves if Botto would be closed on Christmas eve)
Q. Do you guys do all you can eat pizza?
A. No we do all you can pay pizza
Q. And when you do that?
A. Any day at any time
Q. Oh how does it work?
A. Super easy, you come in you pay for any pizza you want and we make it. Then you eat it all!
Q. I don't understand but maybe I'll try one day, today I just going to order a pizza.
storming in during lunch rush and the restaurant is packed
Q. so I heard you guys are going out of business
Q. It's a tough location
Q. Well today you are busy eh?
A. Oh no these are all friends and family member saying good by for the last time.
Q. When is your last day?
A.Just right after lunch today we close and we and that's it. Next week there will be a $5.95 all you can eat buffet, it's going to be totally awesome
Q. I'll check that out
A. Allrighty then!
Q. Is your fettuccine Alfredo nice and creamy and cheesy
A. Yes exactly
Q. But I can't eat much cheese, can you do it without?
A. Sure no problem
Q. How about light on the cheese
Q. But also no to much cream if you don't mind.
Q. But then I think won't be as delicious as it should be
Q. Maybe cream is ok just light on the cheese
Q. You know what just make it the way it is